Sleeping Beauty……my real version.

This was written by me a few years ago when I decided to confront my health issues face on, even if just for myself and not with others. These issues have impacted every aspect of my life. Here’s the story I wrote about the fatigue that is part of both fibro and depression. It’s also, I guess, about aging and not being the “princess” I had planned to be. Just call me Aurora.

Sleeping Beauty

There’s a secret version of the story, one never told because it is so improper and unpleasant.

In this story, a tragedy befalls the princess as before. A tiny prick overwhelms her system, and she enters a deep sleep.

But, in this story, the other gift of the fairy godmother was never given and only the princess sleeps. For a time, it is tragic and poignant and beautiful. But, time goes on as it will. She is missed but is more and more a memory. She senses the world going on all around her. The passing of time is not lost on her mind or her spirit or her body, but she is trapped by her need to sleep, by her all encompassing fatigue.

Real princes don’t rescue princesses growing old with what looks like napping. Hell, they don’t even notice them. It’s not like tired, middle aged princesses are sleeping right in front of dragons who need to be slain. Sleeping Beauty isn’t such a beauty anymore. The world has passed her by. And, the cruelest fate is that she knew it but was truly powerless.

Fairytales aren’t often about powerlessness, but it is the truth of the fatigue that comes with the thorn known as fibroymyalgia, Fibro. Maybe it doesn’t take a prince, but the princess in this case can’t necessarily rescue herself. That goes against all the feminist fairytales I’ve told over the years. But, I fear it’s true. Sleeping Beauty sleeps on as the brambles grow ’round the castle, the dust covers the grand entry and ballroom, and the courtiers all move on to other pursuits. And, Sleeping Beauty knows it, but is powerless to wake herself.

It is an almost unimaginable fatigue. A fatigue of mind, soul, and body. I don’t even know if I want to wake up. All that seems left is a lost life and dust.

Advertisements

~ by Janice Holladay on August 20, 2011.

4 Responses to “Sleeping Beauty……my real version.”

  1. I am so glad I found this it really touch my heart. I think you should write more
    Just loved it.xoxoxo Linda

  2. I know that princess. Ugh, that brings me back to some of my worst days. (I fall somewhere in the family of chronic fatigue/ low thyroid /autoimmune issues.) Thanks for sharing.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

 
%d bloggers like this: